Pandas Don't Exist
I don't believe that pandas are real. I think they are just humans inside panda suits.
The first panda was a creative costume designer who made a realistic panda suit.
But then people took it seriously and thought pandas were real.
It spiraled from there.
Now there is secret society of panda impersonators.
One of these days at a zoo I'm going to rush into the exhibit and find the zipper to the panda suit and expose them all.
I'm tired of being lied to.